Chak De Lagaan....She's the Man

When I first saw the promos of "Dil Bole Hadippa" I was almost sure that this was going to be a Yashraj tried-and-tested formula film, with a punjabi theme, a romantic element, and comedy. I was very keen to watch it nevertheless because I love Yashraj movies! I even loved 'Mohobbatein', 'Mujhse Dosti Karoge', and 'Mere Yaar Ki Shaadi Hain'....toh yeh kitni buri ho sakti hain. :D With this thought and the least expectations, I went to see this movie.

Now, coming to the title of this post, you might be thinking that I've totally lost it! Let me assure you that it's nothing like that....it's just a few of the movies that Hadippa reminded me of.

The story opens with Veera Kaur, a worldclass right tey left hand batsman! Our buffalo girl worships cricket like most other Indians. The difference is that she is an excellent player waiting for her talent to be tapped. However, such an opportunity never comes up in her small village in The Punjab until a star cricketer dude from"The English" shows up to help his father (Anupam Kher) build a cricket team to win the Aman cup against the team from Lahore. Circumstances force Veera to become Veer Pratap Singh in a desperate attempt to fulfill her dream. This reminds me of the movie called "She's the Man", the only difference being it was soccer there instead of cricket.

What follows is very predictable and yet absolutely enjoyable. Its fun to watch Veer/Veera juggle the double-role act. Rohan's (Shahid Kapur) tough coach act kept reminding me of Kabir Khan (SRK) from Chak De! India all the time. There is also a love story between Veera and Rohan (obviously...duh!). She brings out the desi boy in him and brings him closer to his roots. The "Ishq Hi Hain Rab" song is reminiscent of "aisa des hain mera" from Veer Zaara.

The climax is but obviously the Aman cup cricket match...no points for guessing that! It's a Lagaan-esque cricket final. It includes a few dramatic situations, a few revelations, and a few tears. Again, no points for guessing who wins and who scores the most! The presentations after the match include a "veer ka parda faash" scene and a bhashan about how girls don't get an equal opportunity when it comes to cricket...blah blah blah....

Acting-wise, Rani is more adorable as Veer than as Veera. I loved the cute little Sardar act of hers :D Shahid Kapur is good....somewhat a repetition of his Jab We Met act, though every time he runs, I remember him running in Kaminey with all those muscles flashing! :D The other supporting cast includes Anupam Kher, Dalip Tahil, Rakhi Sawant, Sherlyn Chopra, Vrajesh Hirjee, Poonam Dhillon, and Vallabh Vyas. All of them are well suited to their characters and support ably.

The music is pretty good, with a lot of bhangra beats, as aptly said in one of the songs..."discowale khisko ... desi beat bajani...". I personally liked the title track the best, but it was adorable to watch Rani romance Rakhi in the "bhangra bistar beer bater" song.

Overall, this movie is not the greatest or the best, but definitely at par with the rest. It is a good entertainer and definitely worth a dekko. Toh bhool fikraa...hain jigraa...toh sang mere bol hadippa...

U Turn

I had heard a lot of good things about the award-winning Marathi drama called "U Turn". And I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed it.

The story is about the relationship between a lonely man and a woman in their fifties, and the obstacles they face. Dr. Girish Oak plays Major Sudhir Vaidya, a retired army-man, divorced, with a young married daughter living in a different city. Ila Bhate plays Rama Gokhale, a widow, whose only son is well-settled abroad.

Circumstances bring these two together and even though they are as different as chalk and cheese, a beautiful bond of friendship and understanding develops. As in most of our films, the main problem is the belief that"ek aadmi aur aurat kabhi dost nahi ho sakte". Major is seeking a companion and Rama seems like the perfect candidate. They eventually start living together as companions. Both are confident that their children are mature enough to understand their relationship and their loneliness. Major is desperate to forget the past due to the bad memories, while Rama loves dreaming about all the beautiful moments from the past. However, both decide to live only for the present, forgetting everything from their past life. As time progresses, both realize that it is very difficult to forget things that are imbibed deep in your heart. Also, kids from both sides resist strongly, and it becomes difficult to move on. In the end, it is a dilemma between doing what you want and ignoring the kids you love or doing everything for the kids' happiness as you have been doing all your life and lead a lonely life forever.

Will Major and Rama choose their happiness and continue living together? Or will they make a sacrifice for their kids again? I guess you should watch the play to find out. It has a common but well scripted story, excellent performances by both the actors, and also a few comic situations and lines. All in all, a very nice play and a great one-time watch.

The Name Game

Shakespeare once said "What's in the name?", ya jaise humare filmo mein kehte hain "Naam mein kya rakha hain?". However, as far as Bollywood movies are concerned, name is a very important part of the package. It is one of the primary things that enables people in making a decision about watching or not watching a movie.

Our movie names fall into the following major categories:

Jaisa Naam Waisa Kaam

These are the films with straightforward and clear names. What they name is what they mean. You know whether you fall into the intended audience for the film simply by reading the name. You can also make out the genre and the overview of the story from the name.

Some examples that fall in this section include

• Luck
• Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
• Kuch Kuch Hota Hain
• Road
• Love Aaj Kal
• Chandani Chowk to China
• Hum Aapke Hain Kaun
• Maine Pyar Kiya
• Yeh Dillagi
• Kaho Na Pyar Hain
• Mohobbatein
• No Smoking
• Jism
• Coolie
• Biwi No. 1
• Atank Hi Atank
• Prem Deewane
• Sanam Bewafa
• Bhoot
• Judwaa
• Pati, Patni, Aur Woh
• Jeena Sirf Mere Liye
• Bachna Aye Haseeno
• Fightclub
• Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam
• Main Madhuri Dixit Banana Chahti Hoon

and so on....

Dikhane Ke Daat Aur Khaane Ke Daat

This category proudly boasts of those films jinke naam aur content mein koi taal-mel hona zaroori nahin hain. Films with abstract names also fall into this section.

You cannot make out the content of the movie by simply reading the name, and thus, this doesn't allow a yes/no decision making process as far as watching the movie is concerned. The viewer is expected to think and read between the lines to understand the significance of the name.

Basically, you just watch the movie because you want to or because you have heard it is good, but if you want to find out the significance of the name, you need to put your grey cells to work.

Some such movies include:

• Parineeta
• Dor
• Black
• Taare Zameen Par
• Manorama Six Feet Under
• Dhoop
• Kachche Dhaage
• 3 Deewarein
• 99
• Bheja Fry
• Parzania
• Astitva
• Maharathi

Kya Farak Padta Hain

The films that fall into this category are either those that are so pathetic that the name doesn't matter, or those made by established film-makers or actors for which the maker's or actor's name is far more important. In either case, they arouse a lot of curiosity and attract strong viewership at least initially after the film opens. The films kismat ultimately depends on the viewers' response.

Some examples include:

• Kaminey
• Black
• Silsila
• Maqbool
• Lamhe
• 15 Park Avenue
• Mr. India
• Ta Ra Rum Pum
• Baabarr
• Gajagamini

There are some names that have been used and reused for ages. Some examples are "Dosti", "Yaarana", "Naseeb", "Kismat", "Jaaneman", various versions of "Dil" and "Pyar" etc. Are we at a loss of creative names for our films? Also, in modern times, a long name and a neat shortform increase the coolness factor of a film. This has nothing to do with the content; people just like to use nicknames! For example, I don't remember the last time I referred to "Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge" by its full name...it is always "DDLJ" and similarly "Dil Toh Pagal Hain" is always "DTPH" and "Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna" is always "KANK". I doubt whether people in the black and white era ever called "Chalti Ka Naam Gaadi" as "CKNG" or "Do Aankhen Barah Haath" as "DABH"!!

Anyway, to stop my endless babbling, the conclusion of this entire discussion is that how much ever we try, it's very hard to figure out the nitty-gritties of the name game, the repetitions of some name over generations and the most recent addition - numerology!!

The fact remains that the name shouldn't matter and neither should the "star" cast...the success factor should always be the storyline and the performances! (How idealistic of me to even draw such a conclusion!)

Dialogue-Bhaaji!

Hindi movies are being made since ages. One thing is common in most of them....cliched dialogues! Themes and concepts keep changing (or so one can hope!!) but there are some lines that never change. And in a way, that's great, because those situations demand those lines, and they sound good only when written and said in that specific manner.

So, here goes a list of some cliched dialogues of Hindi cinema.

1. Bhagwan ke ghar der hain andher nahin
2. Maa...main first class first aaya hoon
3. Beta, maine tumhare liye gajar ka halwa banaya hain
4. Main tumhare bachche ki maa banane wali hoon
5. Bahar hi khade rahoge ya andar bhi aaoge
6. Main ______ ko aapke paas apni amanat samajhke chodke jaa raha hoon
7. Jug jug jiyo beta...bhagwan kare tumhe mere bhi umar lag jaye
8. Ab inhe dava ki nahi dua ki jaroorat hain
9. Kanoon ke haath bahut lambe hote hain
10. Agar tune maa ka doodh piya hain toh saamne aaa
11. Bachaooooooo....
12. Khamoshhhhh
13. Yeh tumhara judwa bhai hain jo bachpan mein kumbh ke mele mein bichad gaya tha
14. Tumne mujhe dhoka diya hain...main tumhe kabhi maaf nahi karoongi
15. Bhagwan jab deta hain to chappar faad ke deta hain
16. Uparwale pe bharosa rakho
17. Main tumhare bina jee nahi sakta...
18. Mujhe kuch der ke liye akela chod do...
19. Yeh dhamki nahi...chetavni hain...
20. Mera waqt aa gaya hain....tum apne chote bhai/behen ka khayal rakhna
21. Aaj tumhari maa/pitaji zinda hote toh unhe tumpar naaz hota
22. Agar tum meri nahin hui toh kisi aur ki nahi ho sakti...
23. Kalmoohiii....Tuney biradari mein hamari naak kata di...hume kahin ka nahi choda
24. Mubarak ho...ladka hua hain
25. Mubarak ho...aapke ghar chand jaisi beti aayi hain
26. ______ ko hosh aa gaya hain...ab aap unse mil sakte hain
27. Hum maa aur bachche mein se sirf ek ko bacha sakte hain
28. Dhyan rakhna...inka dil bahut kamjor hain...inhe koi sadma nahi pahunche
29. Mere dil mein ched/suraag hain
30. Yeh adaalat ki tauheen hain
31. Apni zabaan ko lagaam do
32. Naheeeeeeeee
33. Chodo mera haath....
34. Chodo mera haath.....aaaaa.....you are hurting me (this is the modern day version of #33)
35. Tum jis school mein padhte they hum uske principal reh chuke hain
36. Kuch aisa karo ki saap bhi mar jaye aur laathi bhi na toote
37. Tumne hamare khandan ka naam mitti mein mila diya
38. _____ karne se pehle tumhe meri laash per se gujarna hoga
39. Main _____ karke rahoonga.....rok sako toh rok lo
40. Yeh sunane se pehle mere kaan kyu nahi fat gaye
41. Hey bhagwan...yeh din dekhne se pehle yeh dharti kyu nahi fat gaye?
42. Kya yehi din dekhne ke liye maine tujhe paal-pos ke bada kiya tha
43. Tujhe meri kasam hain
44. Apne aadmiyon se kahon apne hathyar fek de
45. Yeh tumhe bahut mehenga padega...
46. Aage aage dekho hota hain kya
47. Sapno ki duniya se bahar aao
48. Sach ki hamesha jeet hoti hain
49. Maine aapka namak khaya hain
50. Mehmaan bhagwan ka roop hote hain...
51. Sharam aani chahiye tumhe...
52. Tumhe chullu bhar paani mein doob marna chahiye
53. Bhagwan tera lakh lakh shukar hain
54. Duniya ki koi bhi takat hum dono ko juda nahi kar sakti
55. Ghee agar seedhi ungli se nahi nikla toh ungli tedhi karni padti hain

This list of "Ghise-peete Repeate" dialogues seems to be going on forever. In short, these lines are the basis of our movies and inke bina hamari hindi filme adhoori hain.

Y(L)uck!

The only reason why I ended up watching "Luck" was because I was taking a road trip in a bus, and I was not sleepy enough! I "had to" watch the movie that was being screened to keep myself from getting bored to death in the 8 hr journey.

Well, the film didn't quite last the entire time but it might as well have since it was so entertaining! Before you jump to wrong conclusions, I mean that it's entertainment value lies in the fact that it was completely brainless, absolutely silly, and just enough to keep you engaged to see what stupid thing comes next. If I were to review it professionally, I wouldn't dare give it more than 2 out of 10!

The basic plot involves a Mafia boss Karim Moosa (Sanjay Dutt) recruiting "lucky" people from all over the world with the help of his 'right-hand-man' Tamaang (Danny Denzongpa). The idea is to engage these poor, needy folks in a series of life-threatening tasks and make money from bets placed by rich idiots globally. The chosen lucky ones include heavily-in-debt Ram Mehra (Imran Khan), "badla"-seeking Ayesha/Natasha (Shruti Hassan), terminal-wife-to-save Major Jawar Pratap Singh (Mithun Chakraborty), escaped-from-death-row serial killer Raghav (Ravi Kishen), sold-by-parents Shortcut (Chitrashi Rawat), and other firang dudes and dudettes.

From day one it is a game with the basic principle of "survival of the luckiest". Everyday is a matter of life and death...only the luckiest can survive until the end! Each game is more stupid than the previous. There are guns held to each other's head while everyone stands in a circle, there are parachutes, sharks and burning trains. Jaise purane filmo mein bolte they.."aap ko dava ki nahi dua ki jaroorat hain"...waise isme sabko "luck ki jaroorat hain". In addition, there is also a "the script definitely didn't demand it" bikini scene with Shruti Hassan...it is a pathetic attempt to add some oomph value!

However, the last scene takes the cake for me...here's how it goes (sorry for the spoiler but I couldn't resist the temptation! :D)

Imran Khan is the last man standing ("koi shaque" ;) ). He challenges Sanjay Dutt to a shooting game. Each one has a gun with a single bullet. Both fire simultaneously...the luckiest one will survive. As luck would have it, both hit the mark and for a moment one begins to think that both of their "lucks" gave out. However, Moosa survives with the bullet hitting his arm and as far as Ram is concerned.......

wait for it.....

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he survives because his heart is not where it was supposed to be! It is on the right side instead of the left! It was hillarious to hear the doctor say it, and more hillarious to see the bewilderment on Imran Khan's face! Damn...he found this out after more than 20-25 yrs of his life...kya maa-baap kabhi usko doctor ke paas nahi leke gaye?

To add to this silliness, the "Aazma luck" track plays in the background all through the movie. Listening between the lines, it might actually mean "aazma patience aur sahanshakti" to the audience.

"Luck" is supposed to be an action flick but the action scenes lack "dum". The action sequences seem like poor rip-offs from Hollywood movies! The dialogues are cheesy and don't make much of an impact. I would have personally appreciated if they didn't bother to include any songs...just a good background score would have sufficed!

As far as the performances are concerned, Sanjay Dutt and Danny "puck"au you with their endless banter about luck and how Sanju baba is the luckiest dude ever! In my honest opinion, Imran Khan should stick to romantic, chocolate-boy roles...action doesn't quite suit him. Else his luck might give up on him and he might end up as a "one film wonder". Shruti Hassan didn't get a good launchpad as one would have thought about for Kamal Hassan's daughter. She has a lot of work to do as far as her acting and dialogue delivery is concerned. Mithunda is "than"da with cheesy lines like "koi shaque". Ravi Kishen and Chitrashi Rawat have done pretty well in their characters.

All in all, you better duck, because "Luck" sucks, is not worth the buck, and is full of muck...LOL!

Oh Yeah!

Winston Churchill once said “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” This quote precisely summarizes the essence of the movie "Yes Man".

Yes Man is the story of Carl, a very unsociable and aloof man on the verge of being a pessimist. He finds excuses to avoid hanging out with friends, and is stuck in a boring job. He is tired of his annoying neighbor, the overfriendly manager at work, and for that matter, even the guy on the street distributing pamphlets for a band recital. Bottom line is that his life sucks!

Then comes the day when he meets an old pal, who seems to be in seventh heaven. He reveals the secret of his happiness and suggests that Carl become a "Yes Man" and get out of the rut. Carl attends the self-help seminar recommended by his friend, and then takes a vow to say "yes" to every question asked in order to seize every opportunity. What follows is Carl's journey of living life king size, doing things from bungee jumping, guitar lessons, and learning Korean, to taking a random flight, saving a stranger from committing suicide, going out of his way to give a hobo a ride home, and registering on a Persian bride finder website; things that he had never thought about before. It is a story of how seemingly useless things that he does willingly or unwillingly turn his life for good. He becomes optimistic about everything around him. Most of the humor is generated from things going haywire due to his over-zealousness until he learns to strike a balance.

Jim Carrey is amazing as Carl; he breathes life into the character. The rest of the cast is also well suited. The film has several funny moments, and some typical Carrey-isms.

Overall, it is a wonderful movie.

That said I would like to share some nice quotes on optimism-pessimism that I came across:

“Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both”

“The optimist already sees the scar over the wound; the pessimist still sees the wound underneath the scar”

“An optimist laughs to forget, a pessimist forgets to laugh.”

“Between the optimist and the pessimist, the difference is droll. The optimist sees the doughnut; the pessimist the hole!”

“In the long run the pessimist may be proved right, but the optimist has a better time on the trip.”

“A pessimist only sees the dark side of the clouds, and mopes; a philosopher sees both sides and shrugs; an optimist doesn't see the clouds at all--he's walking on them.”

“Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.” 

Murder They Wrote...

It has been a while since I saw a well-acted “murder” mystery in Bollywood. The reason I put murder in quotes is that this film is a murder mystery without a murder.  The tag line says it all…”How do you murder a man who has already committed suicide?”

The film opens slowly, a tad boringly. We see a typical Bollywood-style dysfunctional marriage with a once-successful, drunk, slightly older husband (Naseeruddin Shah) with a young, attractive, and probably gold-digging wife (Neha Dhupia).  And there is a family friend cum confidante cum lawyer, Boman Irani. A near-death DUI experience for the husband brings an average Joe, Paresh Rawal, into the household as a driver. As the plot progresses, we are introduced to the hopelessness and eccentricity of Naseeruddin Shah’s character.  Then comes a day when he decides to screw his wife’s life for good…he reveals to her and  the driver the secret about his Rs.250,000,000 insurance and the twists and complexities involved in claiming it,  and then commits suicide. All the wife needs to do is prove that he was murdered in order to claim the money. At this point begins a tale of twists and turns, trust and betrayal, and double cross, which keeps the viewer engaged. There are several moments when the movie is totally predictable (at least it was to me!), but it is enjoyable nonetheless.  There are some obvious plot holes and inaccuracies but overall it is a good effort.

Paresh Rawal excels as the driver Subhash. It is a good change to see him as a character-actor rather than a comedian. Boman Irani and Naseeruddin Shah have done a great job as well. Surprisingly, Neha Dhupia is good too! Om Puri is good, but wasted in the miniscule role. The only thing I didn’ t like much was the title..I would rather name it differently, and try not to give away the entire story through the tag line!

This movie is an adaptation of a Gujarati play by Paresh Rawal. It is pretty decent as a film, but I believe it would be more engaging as a play. The screenplay is a little play-like and seems designed to be performed live on stage instead of the silver screen.

In conclusion, “Maharathi” is a good entertainer, with a nice plot, and a stellar cast. Definitely worth a dekko.